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A whale of a time

Question:

On Sun, 21 Mar 2004 11:18:13 +0800, the world was enlightented by Clockmeister, unto whom the words are attributed: > How do really fat people shit anyway? Or does it just get lost in transit?

Something I have often wondered myself, and was trying not to think about. I think you just gotta  s p r e a d  those cheeks… Monster — Who stole my sig?  Who stole it? Own up, dammit!!  It was YOU, wasn’t it?

Response:

There once was a whale named Waggie Who mingled in all, oh so nosy She clung on like schmuck Till one day she got stuck With her face in her butt all so saggy —

Response:

Eleonore Beaudoin wrote: > There once was a whale named Waggie > Who mingled in all, oh so nosy > She clung on like schmuck > Till one day she got stuck > With her face in her butt all so saggy

her butt was saggy or her face was saggy? :p they say when you get old, sag sets in and things start drooping :p > —

– Ghost ICQ# 210-229-120 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   http://community.webshots.com/user/wolf_creek_pass ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Response:

Ghost (black-…@Cookieshaw.ca) writes: > Eleonore Beaudoin wrote: >> There once was a whale named Waggie >> Who mingled in all, oh so nosy >> She clung on like schmuck >> Till one day she got stuck >> With her face in her butt all so saggy > her butt was saggy or her face was saggy? :p

When one weighs 370 over five ft 2, ALL of it sags:). Hand me one of them Big Macs and open the 19th floor window, will ya?L:) (FORE!!!!A-ssssssss-pppllll-attttttsssssshhhpfffffft!!) LOL:)  > they say when you get old, sag sets in and things start drooping :p Yuk:( Saggy scrotums:(:( Blergh:(! Here, have a prune:) ((What’s that whale of a draft??? Oh sh*t…I forgot to open the window when I threw the Big Mac at it….Mppft:)) – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->> — > — > Ghost > ICQ# 210-229-120 > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >   http://community.webshots.com/user/wolf_creek_pass > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Response:

"Eleonore Beaudoin" <bc…@FreeNet.Carleton.CA> wrote in message

news:c3g825$37p$1@freenet9.carleton.ca… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Ghost (black-…@Cookieshaw.ca) writes: > > Eleonore Beaudoin wrote: > >> There once was a whale named Waggie > >> Who mingled in all, oh so nosy > >> She clung on like schmuck > >> Till one day she got stuck > >> With her face in her butt all so saggy > > her butt was saggy or her face was saggy? :p > When one weighs 370 over five ft 2, ALL of it sags:). > Hand me one of them Big Macs and open the 19th floor window, will ya?L:) > (FORE!!!!A-ssssssss-pppllll-attttttsssssshhhpfffffft!!) > LOL:) >  > they say when you get old, sag sets in and things start drooping :p > Yuk:( Saggy scrotums:(:( Blergh:(! > Here, have a prune:) > ((What’s that whale of a draft??? Oh sh*t…I forgot to open the window > when I threw the Big Mac at it….Mppft:))

How do really fat people shit anyway? Or does it just get lost in transit?

Response:

"Eleonore Beaudoin" <bc…@FreeNet.Carleton.CA> wrote in message

news:c3fto4$8s5$1@freenet9.carleton.ca… > There once was a whale named Waggie > Who mingled in all, oh so nosy > She clung on like schmuck > Till one day she got stuck > With her face in her butt all so saggy > —

I saw Waggie!  She lives two doors down from me.

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -"Wanda" (Divr…@charter.net) writes: > "Eleonore Beaudoin" <bc…@FreeNet.Carleton.CA> wrote in message > news:c3fto4$8s5$1@freenet9.carleton.ca… >> There once was a whale named Waggie >> Who mingled in all, oh so nosy >> She clung on like schmuck >> Till one day she got stuck >> With her face in her butt all so saggy >> — > I saw Waggie!  She lives two doors down from me.

You mean *one* door next to you, but takes two door frames for her to get out. And what nakes you think she lives there? She lives in your living room, through binoculars. She hates you each time you order take out. She notes it down, and tells her fat friends on the phone about it. She has reasons to hate you, you see;-). When  it suits her mean goals, she bursts in tears about her whale weight, to get sympathy. Yours will be resented and used against you to your husband, who’ll think her a poor innocent "lady" that is unhappy about her genes. By sympathy, your food deliveries will be made less, and by the rear door, until you end up never orderign out. Soon, you will not enjoy you yard either. Seing you there in summer clothes is enough for her to start inviting tons of fat cheseburger lovers to have a beer gut party with by your fence, in an effort to show she would be popular and would not be a complete freak. Little favors will start being asked from you…Soon, from your hubby. She will cry elephant tears some more to get more sympathy and ask confidentiality. Your hubby will swear on his soul, sad for her. More and more pseudo secrets will be made up. It will invite him to share some of his own to not make hr feel like she would have layed her naked Self tyo him. Just decency in feeling bad for someone pseudo hurting. After there will be enough secrets share, she will let one slip from your hubby’s mouth one day when he will come home with a sad face, starting to feel affinities with her through the secrets, and thinking her an innocent he has an important trust from, feeling trustworthy for polichinelle secrets..And as you will worry about what his long sad face is about, he will say "nothing", to respect the secrets, and resent you to put him on the spot! Until one day somethign will slip in a way too fatly calculated from the start to hurt you about your own trust in your hubby. Something he will have revealed from you both to her, in the sharing the "soul" moments with the fat neighbor. You’ll be stunned and ask what this is all about. You’ll be told that he is since months not at ease to talk with you about certain things. You will remember that months ago he mentioned there was a time when the neighbor cried to him about her whale weight,  and said soem thigns about it that she demanded secret about. You will think that it was stupid of you to trust your own hubby with that and let it all get to this. Ypou will start gettign upset at him for acting that stupid and brain dead as to have secrets with you then -But they don’t concern you!- and see that there yet is absolutely nothign private anymore that was ever respected about you and him. By then, he will not want to order food anymore…without ordering it for the neighbor too. Soon, he will tell you about a nice trip he so much suddenly wants to do with you in the cold of January. You will think he finally ralized who was cold hearted and calculatively bitchy. You’ll have a great holiday. Only to learn that you are  a real possessive thing to not be happy for him and not admire his grandeur and selfless generosity for having planned a Feb V Day weekend with that neighbor, and in fact having offered you a Jan shorter trip for no occasion "Just because we so badly wanted to see each other", talalking to you a la "we" person, deciding for you what you want, and decalrign you wanted that Jan trip and you BOTH had talked about it since long. Read there that he ahd talked about the Feb one with the neighbor since long. You will only learn about the Feb one when he will realize to his chargin that he now has to tell you, realizing all of a sudden that he coudl not account for howcome he would not be there on VDay and for 6 entire days. He will tell you how SHE invited herself and imposed again. How no, he did not lie to you: he ahd not told her either about the trip with you in Jan until she learned about it with her binoculars spottign the pamphlets in your living room. You’ll be hurt raw at your ytrust being abused this way. You will be told that see, that is why he did not tell you in the first place: you never are happy about anything: SHE did not mind and made no comments about the trip in January with you!! You will be stunned SHE knew of your trip with your hubby…and that you just learn about his plan sicne long ago to go with her for V Day weekend in Feb. You will ask howcome he trusts her with your provate life, and lies to you. He will discard you for calling him a liar. He will more and more insist on how he never was opened with you before: that is, he will run to tell the neighbor you "had a fight", and she will tell him suddenly to not have secrets and to tell you about all he ever lied to you about. Not mentioning her part of course. He tehn will tell you all about his trustign the neighbor, who understands so well and has such nice values. You will remember those words being the ones he used to have with you. And sudenly you will be called all that he used to say about her: you will learn that dexribing YOU like the calculative one having dared tryust a Jan trip to mean his realizing what he did wrong was only a bone he threw at you for never trustign the neighbor. You will be thrown at that you made judgements about ehr without knowign her. The next thing you will know, he will tell you why he suddenly wants to be opened with you: cause he talked to the neighbor about it, and so she decided he shoudl do with you. You then realize your fat right next two doors neighbor has your hybby by the balls, and thus got him by the brains. You will be declared to that it is all your fault: that from nwo on he will never tell you anythign about the neighbor and him, and that if he lied to you all that time, it was cause you could not deal with the truth. YOU could not stand her having food deliveries. You will realize by then that all the weekly flowers he sent since the foirst time the neighbor cried and made him promise secret, the only time you knew a little hint of way back, all the flowers, all the smiles, all the showing with you more attentive and even calling you sweetie, darling, my love and other words he never called you until about a month before the trip, that how he called you three tiems like that with such words on his way back to work after the Jan trip, like oen not wantign to let uyou go, you will realizre that all that was done out of his guilt towards you for havign stabbed you day in day out, and that you one day were given pitty for his stupidity. He will feel sorry for how stupid YOU woudl be, not realizing what a coimplete imbecile he is and how he is jerked around like a complete puppet. Things will from then on be anounced and decalred to you. He will decide in your place about yourb feeligns, about your likes and dislikes, and you will know it is not even him that anounces this and that, but her, through calculative sympathy elephant tears and sugar words of gratefulness for the take out food he initially DID send by pitty. It will take him a few years to realize all it was was pitty towards her…And he will be absolutely stunned and angry at you to realize a few years later again, that you changed jobs, cut your hair, changed color, travel each two weekends, take night classes, and all those changes in your life that took place under his very nose as you grew completely apart. You’ll be told he is ""sorry"", and will feel he does not mean it one lousy bit: as he says so, she waits at the doors: sicne a hile you saw he had the doorway made twice as large, and suspect she lives your life entirely. Adn then he will come to you to ask advice about how to get it up with her, sayign that each time he thought they coudl hit it off, his weewee coudl not work. He will say in a whisper that it is the weight thing. That oh yes,  he oudl love her and loves her but "not that way", cause each time they finally get together, the lever does not wanna move at all. That he is terrified. A real phobia. He then will confide in you all about how they ahd a trip in August that you knew was for the scouts, one where he offered his grand self to keep her Lonelienss company, and where it was always said to be the most annoying experience. You will learnt hat in fact, it was then a trip he wanted to make romantic with her, but where the penis did not agree. Where they then did other things,which he woudl have been opened about with you if only you were not one to react to such insignificant things told to you a year after the fact…He will say that "no", it had nothign to do with anusing your trust at all. That he never was that close to you and woudl never be that close to anyone. Each tiem you will try and talk it out, and explain how you feel and think about it all, even in efforts to salvage a friendship or acquaintanceship from it, to not be eman, seing he is just a airhead, he will tell you that no, he was not unfair to you, "cause the neighbor did not know you were going to have the Jan trip at all: he had not told her either, she learned through her binoculars! And when she elarnt, she was real nice and said nothing contrary to you when you were declared to you inone breath that he and her were going away for V Day… You will ask howcome you can not talk to him about your by then """friendship"" on the double rocks without him constantly using her as a reference point to what he did right or wrong towards you: lyign to you is excused by "but I lied to her too! I had not told her about the KJan trip! I mean…I was going to tell her but … read more »

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