Act Acting » Acting Drama » mighty hunteress (long)
mighty hunteress (long)
Question:
Cool, more bastard cat tricks. Have you ever thought of Tartar Control Crest? Sorry, even without the idea that one of the cats eating his breakfast in bed, the idea of raw heart really grosses me out. Its gross enough cooked. Pam S. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – We occasionally feed Ted raw heart to clean her teeth a bit (she won’t eat raw chicken). We cut it into large chunks so that she can get her teeth around it, but still has to chew to get a mouthfull. Last night she decided that she didn’t want to eat her heart while we were up and instead picked up individual chunks and spread them about her bathroom (yes, she has her own bathroom) and a bit into the hallway. No big drama, the bathroom is tiled and the hallway has a wooden floor.
Response:
ACK! Didn’t see the original of this one either (must have words to those ISP people – I don’t care if the need a pint of my blood to get it moving again, but the first NG through *must* be *this* NG, and it must be *whole*. I"d sacrifice the rest of my Usenet reading to get perfect feed of this one! Anyway Tish, thanks for cheering me up. Like Theresa said, we sorely needed a luagh after all the sad things that have happened hear recently, and this one once again got the tear ducts working – but through mirth, not sadness. Thanks! Yowie
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Thanks for this, I needed the laugh after reading the posts of the kitties that have moved on to the Rainbow Bridge. Hi All, Last night Ted decided to continue her intermittent career as a mighty hunter. I had better start back at the beginning. We got Ted as an approximately 6 year old cat. At the time she came to us we lived in a terrace house in Melbourne (Australia). Terrace houses tend to be all of similar design, kitchen and bathroom at the back, a lounge room or two and then a long hallway with bedrooms coming off it. We lived in the bedroom nearest the front of the house. One night, in the middle of winter, we were awoken by the most perculiar sound – it sounded like Ted, but amplified and muffled. The sound got closer and closer, progressing along the full length of the house, until it was in our room. Dave got up and turned on the light (I’m difficult to get out of bed in the middle of the night in winter), took a look around to see what was happening, and then burst into loud and slightly hysterical laughter. Ted, the almighty hunter, had been hunting in our kitchen and had captured what we call a ufo squash (golden nugget squash that look like miniature UFOs). Actually, she’d only caught half of a cooked one, because that was all we’d left on the kitchen table. Silly moggy was acting just as though she’d kilt it herself and she was dragging it up the hallway to give it to us as a present. She had proudly advertised her kill (with a mouthfull) all the way through the house Needless to say she was most offended when we fell about laughing. Fast forward several years to last night. We occasionally feed Ted raw heart to clean her teeth a bit (she won’t eat raw chicken). We cut it into large chunks so that she can get her teeth around it, but still has to chew to get a mouthfull. Last night she decided that she didn’t want to eat her heart while we were up and instead picked up individual chunks and spread them about her bathroom (yes, she has her own bathroom) and a bit into the hallway. No big drama, the bathroom is tiled and the hallway has a wooden floor. Ted decided that a midnight snack was in order. She had been sleeping, snug and warm, between us under the covers. I guess she decided that she would also like to consume her snack there because the first I heard of it was the same perculiar amplified and muffled yowl originating in her bathroom and proceeding down the hall towards us. By the time I got it together to open my eyes, cover Dave’s closed ones (what a kind spouse I am!) and turn on the light, Ted was at the foot of the bed with a large, bloody chunk of heart in her mouth. Her tail was up and she had a wicked feline grin all over her face (what you could see behind the heart). She sees me and carefully, calculatingly, drops said bloody gobbet onto our nice clean beige carpet. Bloomin’ heck! (you can substitute the real words yourself) What an effective way of getting a reluctant Tish out of bed and padding around the house in the middle of the night. I gently retrieved her prey item and returned it to her bathroom. Ted wasn’t real happy, but I didn’t really care because I wasn’t real happy either. As far as I’m aware Ted et the rest of the piece in the bathroom. That, however, is not the end of the story. Fast forward again. This time it’s about 4am, the sleepiest and darkest time of night. Once again I’m awoken by proud, yowling cat and then disgusting lip-smacking and chewing noises. I hear Dave groaning next to me. I know that groan; it means "aaargh who woke me and why don’t you ***k off". I decided that Dave could deal with this one, so poked him and told him it was his turn. Dave obligingly gets up, turns on the light and announces that Ted’s just finished her snack and that I’d be hearing about this in the morning. Bastard cat. Bastard’s cat’s revenge. I got serious grief this morning from Dave. My crime: waking him from a sound sleep in the middle of the night to witness Ted finishing her last mouthfull of heart. Ted know what she was doing and *knew* that by the time we reacted she’d be finished. Somehow she knew (when I didn’t) that Dave wouldn’t be woken by the sound and that I would. aaargh. Worst part is that she’s getting the other half of the heart tonight! Tish to email: nobody becomes lsilberb
Response:
Thanks for this, I needed the laugh after reading the posts of the kitties that have moved on to the Rainbow Bridge. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Hi All, Last night Ted decided to continue her intermittent career as a mighty hunter. I had better start back at the beginning. We got Ted as an approximately 6 year old cat. At the time she came to us we lived in a terrace house in Melbourne (Australia). Terrace houses tend to be all of similar design, kitchen and bathroom at the back, a lounge room or two and then a long hallway with bedrooms coming off it. We lived in the bedroom nearest the front of the house. One night, in the middle of winter, we were awoken by the most perculiar sound – it sounded like Ted, but amplified and muffled. The sound got closer and closer, progressing along the full length of the house, until it was in our room. Dave got up and turned on the light (I’m difficult to get out of bed in the middle of the night in winter), took a look around to see what was happening, and then burst into loud and slightly hysterical laughter. Ted, the almighty hunter, had been hunting in our kitchen and had captured what we call a ufo squash (golden nugget squash that look like miniature UFOs). Actually, she’d only caught half of a cooked one, because that was all we’d left on the kitchen table. Silly moggy was acting just as though she’d kilt it herself and she was dragging it up the hallway to give it to us as a present. She had proudly advertised her kill (with a mouthfull) all the way through the house Needless to say she was most offended when we fell about laughing. Fast forward several years to last night. We occasionally feed Ted raw heart to clean her teeth a bit (she won’t eat raw chicken). We cut it into large chunks so that she can get her teeth around it, but still has to chew to get a mouthfull. Last night she decided that she didn’t want to eat her heart while we were up and instead picked up individual chunks and spread them about her bathroom (yes, she has her own bathroom) and a bit into the hallway. No big drama, the bathroom is tiled and the hallway has a wooden floor. Ted decided that a midnight snack was in order. She had been sleeping, snug and warm, between us under the covers. I guess she decided that she would also like to consume her snack there because the first I heard of it was the same perculiar amplified and muffled yowl originating in her bathroom and proceeding down the hall towards us. By the time I got it together to open my eyes, cover Dave’s closed ones (what a kind spouse I am!) and turn on the light, Ted was at the foot of the bed with a large, bloody chunk of heart in her mouth. Her tail was up and she had a wicked feline grin all over her face (what you could see behind the heart). She sees me and carefully, calculatingly, drops said bloody gobbet onto our nice clean beige carpet. Bloomin’ heck! (you can substitute the real words yourself) What an effective way of getting a reluctant Tish out of bed and padding around the house in the middle of the night. I gently retrieved her prey item and returned it to her bathroom. Ted wasn’t real happy, but I didn’t really care because I wasn’t real happy either. As far as I’m aware Ted et the rest of the piece in the bathroom. That, however, is not the end of the story. Fast forward again. This time it’s about 4am, the sleepiest and darkest time of night. Once again I’m awoken by proud, yowling cat and then disgusting lip-smacking and chewing noises. I hear Dave groaning next to me. I know that groan; it means "aaargh who woke me and why don’t you ***k off". I decided that Dave could deal with this one, so poked him and told him it was his turn. Dave obligingly gets up, turns on the light and announces that Ted’s just finished her snack and that I’d be hearing about this in the morning. Bastard cat. Bastard’s cat’s revenge. I got serious grief this morning from Dave. My crime: waking him from a sound sleep in the middle of the night to witness Ted finishing her last mouthfull of heart. Ted know what she was doing and *knew* that by the time we reacted she’d be finished. Somehow she knew (when I didn’t) that Dave wouldn’t be woken by the sound and that I would. aaargh. Worst part is that she’s getting the other half of the heart tonight! Tish to email: nobody becomes lsilberb
Response:
all our edibles must be secured or they become catfood or toys. When I leave a corn muffin in a plastic baggie I have to put the baggie in the cabinet or Allie Kat will chew through the plastic Felix just recently came running through the house yowling at the top of his lungs. He came into the bedroom then headed out and into my computer room. Thinking that he may have caught a mouse I bravely got out of bed to see what was up. Yeah right, a mouse. What he had gotten was a scone that I had put in a
plastic baggy and placed on the table. It was only recognizable because I knew what was in that bag. He totally crumbled that scone until it looked like cracker
meal with a few lumps in it. Here he was in the computer room with the bag, throwing it up in the air, catching it and throwing it up again. All the time yelling at the top of his lungs. He was so proud of his kill that I couldn’t get mad at him for taking
something off the table and waking me up with his big mouth at 4:30 in the morning, just – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -45 minutes before I have to get up for work. (The very best sleeping time) So out to the kitchen I went, made myself a pot of coffee, and fed Felix some of his kill. — Beverly I’ve been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It’s not. Mine had me trained in two days. – Bill Dana, Comedian Hi All, Last night Ted decided to continue her intermittent career as a mighty hunter. <snip Tish to email: nobody becomes lsilberb
suz #5A macmoosette Dogs come when they’re called; cats take a message and get back to you later.-Mary Bly Please note: I was a cat in my past life 
)
Response:
Well, I have a tale about a cat I fostered, although not as funny as this was. Tigger was about 5 years when I took her on. She had been abused at some point in her past, which meant that she disappeared any time a man with a beard was about (upset my friend badly, as he loves cats). She was in our local shelter and literally climbing the walls, yelling at the other cats, etc. Medically she wasn’t great either. (Try putting ear drops into a cat who doesn’t want to know.) Anyway, after a great deal of work, she learned to trust me and liked bringing me ‘treats’ to show her appreciation. Well, that Christmas, my Mum and sister where here (nine months after I took her on). Tigger decided that she really liked my sister and brought my sister the highest accolade in her eyes. A (dead) mouse. Very fresh, still warm. Well, my sister screamed. (She claims she didn’t but Mum and I both heard her.) Tigger was very insulted, of course, and stalked out (never spoke to my sister again, of course). I managed to get the mouse off of her before the deposited it in one of my shoes and showed the appropriate appreciation of the gift. Every so often Mum and I remind my sister of this. She will never live that one down! Andrea Tigger is now happily rehomed with a retired couple, as I found she was happier when people were around all day. She is doing very well, is fit and healthy and has lost all of her abnormal behaviour. Hard work at the time, but very rewarding. — Andrea Fuller Winchester, England HEDS, FMS, and OA Please excuse any typos or odd phrases. I am talking to the Dragon.
Response:
Sent you a copy Vickie. You probably have a lot of copies by now, but I couldn’t resist. Pam S. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – ACK! Didn’t see the original of this one either (must have words to those ISP people – I don’t care if the need a pint of my blood to get it moving again, but the first NG through *must* be *this* NG, and it must be *whole*. I"d sacrifice the rest of my Usenet reading to get perfect feed of this one! Anyway Tish, thanks for cheering me up. Like Theresa said, we sorely needed a luagh after all the sad things that have happened hear recently, and this one once again got the tear ducts working – but through mirth, not sadness. Thanks! Yowie Thanks for this, I needed the laugh after reading the posts of the kitties that have moved on to the Rainbow Bridge. Hi All, Last night Ted decided to continue her intermittent career as a mighty hunter. I had better start back at the beginning. We got Ted as an approximately 6 year old cat. At the time she came to us we lived in a terrace house in Melbourne (Australia). Terrace houses tend to be all of similar design, kitchen and bathroom at the back, a lounge room or two and then a long hallway with bedrooms coming off it. We lived in the bedroom nearest the front of the house. One night, in the middle of winter, we were awoken by the most perculiar sound – it sounded like Ted, but amplified and muffled. The sound got closer and closer, progressing along the full length of the house, until it was in our room. Dave got up and turned on the light (I’m difficult to get out of bed in the middle of the night in winter), took a look around to see what was happening, and then burst into loud and slightly hysterical laughter. Ted, the almighty hunter, had been hunting in our kitchen and had captured what we call a ufo squash (golden nugget squash that look like miniature UFOs). Actually, she’d only caught half of a cooked one, because that was all we’d left on the kitchen table. Silly moggy was acting just as though she’d kilt it herself and she was dragging it up the hallway to give it to us as a present. She had proudly advertised her kill (with a mouthfull) all the way through the house Needless to say she was most offended when we fell about laughing. Fast forward several years to last night. We occasionally feed Ted raw heart to clean her teeth a bit (she won’t eat raw chicken). We cut it into large chunks so that she can get her teeth around it, but still has to chew to get a mouthfull. Last night she decided that she didn’t want to eat her heart while we were up and instead picked up individual chunks and spread them about her bathroom (yes, she has her own bathroom) and a bit into the hallway. No big drama, the bathroom is tiled and the hallway has a wooden floor. Ted decided that a midnight snack was in order. She had been sleeping, snug and warm, between us under the covers. I guess she decided that she would also like to consume her snack there because the first I heard of it was the same perculiar amplified and muffled yowl originating in her bathroom and proceeding down the hall towards us. By the time I got it together to open my eyes, cover Dave’s closed ones (what a kind spouse I am!) and turn on the light, Ted was at the foot of the bed with a large, bloody chunk of heart in her mouth. Her tail was up and she had a wicked feline grin all over her face (what you could see behind the heart). She sees me and carefully, calculatingly, drops said bloody gobbet onto our nice clean beige carpet. Bloomin’ heck! (you can substitute the real words yourself) What an effective way of getting a reluctant Tish out of bed and padding around the house in the middle of the night. I gently retrieved her prey item and returned it to her bathroom. Ted wasn’t real happy, but I didn’t really care because I wasn’t real happy either. As far as I’m aware Ted et the rest of the piece in the bathroom. That, however, is not the end of the story. Fast forward again. This time it’s about 4am, the sleepiest and darkest time of night. Once again I’m awoken by proud, yowling cat and then disgusting lip-smacking and chewing noises. I hear Dave groaning next to me. I know that groan; it means "aaargh who woke me and why don’t you ***k off". I decided that Dave could deal with this one, so poked him and told him it was his turn. Dave obligingly gets up, turns on the light and announces that Ted’s just finished her snack and that I’d be hearing about this in the morning. Bastard cat. Bastard’s cat’s revenge. I got serious grief this morning from Dave. My crime: waking him from a sound sleep in the middle of the night to witness Ted finishing her last mouthfull of heart. Ted know what she was doing and *knew* that by the time we reacted she’d be finished. Somehow she knew (when I didn’t) that Dave wouldn’t be woken by the sound and that I would. aaargh. Worst part is that she’s getting the other half of the heart tonight! Tish to email: nobody becomes lsilberb
Response:
Abbe(RB) did this too a couple of times and I’m happy to say it was my sock in her mouth and nothing else 
And I totally know the feeling when you’r not supposed to laugh and just can’t help but to laugh. Eventually we learned to say thank you with only a big grin in our faces I would like to take the opportunity to say I’m really sorry for the losses of Hale Bopp, Kimba and Lady. I still miss my Abbe dearly. I do hope that Lemon Ears will find her way home. My thoughts and prayers are with you all. Marianne
Response:
Felix just recently came running through the house yowling at the top of his lungs. He came into the bedroom then headed out and into my computer room. Thinking that he may have caught a mouse I bravely got out of bed to see what was up. Yeah right, a mouse. What he had gotten was a scone that I had put in a plastic baggy and placed on the table. It was only recognizable because I knew what was in that bag. He totally crumbled that scone until it looked like cracker meal with a few lumps in it. Here he was in the computer room with the bag, throwing it up in the air, catching it and throwing it up again. All the time yelling at the top of his lungs. He was so proud of his kill that I couldn’t get mad at him for taking something off the table and waking me up with his big mouth at 4:30 in the morning, just 45 minutes before I have to get up for work. (The very best sleeping time) So out to the kitchen I went, made myself a pot of coffee, and fed Felix some of his kill. — Beverly I’ve been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It’s not. Mine had me trained in two days. — Bill Dana, Comedian – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi All, Last night Ted decided to continue her intermittent career as a mighty hunter. <snip Tish to email: nobody becomes lsilberb
Response:
waking me up with his big mouth at 4:30 in the morning, just 45 minutes before I have to get up for work. (The very best sleeping time) So out to the kitchen I went, made myself a pot of coffee, and fed Felix some
You’re a more patient woman than *I* would have been at 4:30 a.m.! Lubby mom to Sassy, Smokey, Boots & Sadie the d*g
Response:
When I leave a corn muffin in a plastic baggie I have to put the baggie in the cabinet or Allie Kat will chew through the plastic – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Felix just recently came running through the house yowling at the top of his lungs. He came into the bedroom then headed out and into my computer room. Thinking that he may have caught a mouse I bravely got out of bed to see what was up. Yeah right, a mouse. What he had gotten was a scone that I had put in a plastic baggy and placed on the table. It was only recognizable because I knew what was in that bag. He totally crumbled that scone until it looked like cracker meal with a few lumps in it. Here he was in the computer room with the bag, throwing it up in the air, catching it and throwing it up again. All the time yelling at the top of his lungs. He was so proud of his kill that I couldn’t get mad at him for taking something off the table and waking me up with his big mouth at 4:30 in the morning, just 45 minutes before I have to get up for work. (The very best sleeping time) So out to the kitchen I went, made myself a pot of coffee, and fed Felix some of his kill. — Beverly I’ve been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It’s not. Mine had me trained in two days. – Bill Dana, Comedian Hi All, Last night Ted decided to continue her intermittent career as a mighty hunter. <snip Tish to email: nobody becomes lsilberb
Response:
My granddaughter once told her mother that she would like to come back as a cat and belong to me. I guess I spoil my furkids. — Beverly I’ve been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It’s not. Mine had me trained in two days. — Bill Dana, Comedian
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – waking me up with his big mouth at 4:30 in the morning, just 45 minutes before I have to get up for work. (The very best sleeping time) So out to the kitchen I went, made myself a pot of coffee, and fed Felix some You’re a more patient woman than *I* would have been at 4:30 a.m.! Lubby mom to Sassy, Smokey, Boots & Sadie the d*g
Response:
Hi All, Last night Ted decided to continue her intermittent career as a mighty hunter. I had better start back at the beginning. We got Ted as an approximately 6 year old cat. At the time she came to us we lived in a terrace house in Melbourne (Australia). Terrace houses tend to be all of similar design, kitchen and bathroom at the back, a lounge room or two and then a long hallway with bedrooms coming off it. We lived in the bedroom nearest the front of the house. One night, in the middle of winter, we were awoken by the most perculiar sound – it sounded like Ted, but amplified and muffled. The sound got closer and closer, progressing along the full length of the house, until it was in our room. Dave got up and turned on the light (I’m difficult to get out of bed in the middle of the night in winter), took a look around to see what was happening, and then burst into loud and slightly hysterical laughter. Ted, the almighty hunter, had been hunting in our kitchen and had captured what we call a ufo squash (golden nugget squash that look like miniature UFOs). Actually, she’d only caught half of a cooked one, because that was all we’d left on the kitchen table. Silly moggy was acting just as though she’d kilt it herself and she was dragging it up the hallway to give it to us as a present. She had proudly advertised her kill (with a mouthfull) all the way through the house Needless to say she was most offended when we fell about laughing. Fast forward several years to last night. We occasionally feed Ted raw heart to clean her teeth a bit (she won’t eat raw chicken). We cut it into large chunks so that she can get her teeth around it, but still has to chew to get a mouthfull. Last night she decided that she didn’t want to eat her heart while we were up and instead picked up individual chunks and spread them about her bathroom (yes, she has her own bathroom) and a bit into the hallway. No big drama, the bathroom is tiled and the hallway has a wooden floor. Ted decided that a midnight snack was in order. She had been sleeping, snug and warm, between us under the covers. I guess she decided that she would also like to consume her snack there because the first I heard of it was the same perculiar amplified and muffled yowl originating in her bathroom and proceeding down the hall towards us. By the time I got it together to open my eyes, cover Dave’s closed ones (what a kind spouse I am!) and turn on the light, Ted was at the foot of the bed with a large, bloody chunk of heart in her mouth. Her tail was up and she had a wicked feline grin all over her face (what you could see behind the heart). She sees me and carefully, calculatingly, drops said bloody gobbet onto our nice clean beige carpet. Bloomin’ heck! (you can substitute the real words yourself) What an effective way of getting a reluctant Tish out of bed and padding around the house in the middle of the night. I gently retrieved her prey item and returned it to her bathroom. Ted wasn’t real happy, but I didn’t really care because I wasn’t real happy either. As far as I’m aware Ted et the rest of the piece in the bathroom. That, however, is not the end of the story. Fast forward again. This time it’s about 4am, the sleepiest and darkest time of night. Once again I’m awoken by proud, yowling cat and then disgusting lip-smacking and chewing noises. I hear Dave groaning next to me. I know that groan; it means "aaargh who woke me and why don’t you ***k off". I decided that Dave could deal with this one, so poked him and told him it was his turn. Dave obligingly gets up, turns on the light and announces that Ted’s just finished her snack and that I’d be hearing about this in the morning. Bastard cat. Bastard’s cat’s revenge. I got serious grief this morning from Dave. My crime: waking him from a sound sleep in the middle of the night to witness Ted finishing her last mouthfull of heart. Ted know what she was doing and *knew* that by the time we reacted she’d be finished. Somehow she knew (when I didn’t) that Dave wouldn’t be woken by the sound and that I would. aaargh. Worst part is that she’s getting the other half of the heart tonight! Tish to email: nobody becomes lsilberb
Response:
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